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Monthly Archives: March 2012

this ain’t like me…


This ain’t like me…
I’m no easy ‘fall-for-you’ girl…
I ain’t no sweet talker,
i don’t tell him if he’s my world…

But just the thought of you,
makes me go all sweet sixteen…
like I’d never hurt or been hurt,
by false love beliefs…

I start to smile & I’ll tell it all,
i’ll tell our story to anyone who will hear,
Because I can’t keep in the glow,
as you shine, you make my worries dissapear…

I know i should really question it some,
i should still be discerning as we ‘date’,
but i can’t help but feel like we are so far past
any decisions of that sort we had to make…

Because i love you so much,
I wish I could have known before…
that you would become everything to me,
I can’t imagine ever loving you more…

 

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i want to hold your heart


I sincerely mean it.
When I say someday i want to be your wife
and though you won’t read this…
I won’t let you read this for quite some time…

I know they all say,
I shouldn’t think so far ahead of now…
I shouldn’t be trying on wedding dresses
Or planning our children’s names out…

But I’m living in reality’s dreamworld…
And the future looks so grand after this…
I’m wishing & i’m hoping that we
don’t ever stop treasuring the other’s kiss…

From the bottom of my heart,
from the bottom of my soul,
I have decided it shall be you
whom I forever want to hold.

I want to hold your heart
i want to hold your dreams,
i want to hold your hand,
i want to hold your destiny…

 

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Oh it’s you…


Knowing what you’ve got when you’ve still got it…
that’s just like me & you…
knowing how it it will end, before it happens,
I swear my heart is speaking truth…

when I say this is forever.
when i say the L-word, so overused…
I’ve never felt so certain
without doubt about who i’d choose,

Oh it’s you & your witty jokes,
oh it’s you & your idealistic dreams
oh it’s you & how you care too much,
go ahead & care too much about me…

Oh it’s you & your romantic lines,
it’s you & how you write me reassuring songs,
oh it’s you & your silver blue eyes,
Oh it’s you & it’s been you all along…

I love how you can go off for an hour
about some political irrelevancy,
I love how if you go, you go all the way
I love your great big crazy family…

I love your values how they are rocks,
i love how amazing you are with kids,
i love our late night whispering talks…
I love how I can trust you with all of this…

I love how for the life of you,
you can’t tell me a lie,
& how your lips kind of curl
& give it away if you try,

the best feeling ever is waking up,
& realizing it wasn’t a dream…
It’s so magical what we’ve got right here,
& the best part, is it’s a mutual reality…

 

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Just goes to show


Just goes to show it’s true,
what’s meant to be will be…
You can close your doors, & prolong the fate
but destiny is destiny…

You can call it everything it’s not…
confidants, comrades, just best friends…
you can stifle dreams and feelings all along,
but sooner or later, it all proves pretend…

And reality reveals a deeper truth,
Dreams prove to match from afar,
birth certificates share the same stamp,
…as the same net caught both of our fishing hearts…

Fate lets us get in a goal or two sometimes,
She will make us think we are in control the whole time…
but really we’re just hampsters in a great big sea,
spinning in a ball on waves 10x our size….

We may have clenched our fists on friendship,
held too tightly to everything we held so dear…
But it was fated that we should open our hands,
and thus receive love in the absence of our fear…

 

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TO BE, or to fear?… Resolve of the fearful


BE INSPIRED… i’m trying so hard…
so hard to believe that love is attainable..
BE COURAGEOUS… so very hard
not to shrink from all the risks upon the table…

BE HONEST… who really is?
is that vulnerable when they can’t know?
BE TRUSTING… who knows how?
I only trust my own heart not to run or go…

But then again, it’s running now,
running away with my only chance at love,
if i can’t trust my best friend of years,
then how will i ever be able to open up?

He’s done nothing wrong, but steal my love,
nothing but be sweet & loyal & true…
I hate this stupid wary guarded heart of mine…
and how it tries to pull me away from you…

BUT I SHALL NOT GO! I am inspired…
i shall not back down, i believe in us.
I honestly didn’t know this love existed…
stronger than my own will to run…

I WILL love you forever.
I WILL marry you someday,
I SHALL NOT let my own fear
take the best thing I’ve ever had away….

 

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secrets come naturally


Secrets, they just come naturally to me…
holding in the magnitude is far to easy…
because last time i shared feelings with a boy so deep,
he ran away, far away from me…

I know that was sweet sixteen,
& i was a fool to think it was real,
& this is obviously way more than
any feeling before i ever did feel,

but some scars, never heal,
you are my best friend, thank God…
but even to you, i’m so afraid,
what if we both turn out to be so wrong?

will we be so much more hurt if we know
how much we’ve hurt each other in the end?
maybe we never should have gone out…
I can’t bear the thought of loosing my best friend…

No, I don’t want to break this,
i’m just so afraid if you read all these poems,
that you might change your mind,
or no longer really want to talk again on the phone…

See, this is me freaking out,
some things never change, you know…
This is why I can’t do long distance,
i need you here to hold me, & never let go…

Secrets, are far too easy to keep,
unless I”m looking into your silver blue eyes,
then they all just pour out in great waves,
like the moon entices out the ocean’s tide…

 

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more than a world to me


Don’t make me run away,
Dear God, please help me stay…
so torn between love & fear
just want to have you be near…

& if that means leaving my home…
if that means leaving the sunshine & stars,
if that means leaving my full time job with kids…
Then you know I will do it, but it will be hard…

I’d go days & days without food for you,
give up my last drink of water too,
Just so you know, I want to see this through,
finally i know i’m in love.. with you…

I know there are questions you can’t answer now
but i can wait as long as time is old,
one year with you is worth more than a lifetime without
You warm my heart when I’m cold…

I’d write a thousand songs with your name in them,
or keep it hidden if you asked it of me,
there ain’t nothing in the world i would hold back from you,
I’ll love you as long as I can breathe..

because you are more than a world to me…
you are an infinitly reaching galaxy,
filled with hopes & beautiful dreams,
you are my love, you are my destiny

 

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