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Monthly Archives: March 2012

this ain’t like me…


This ain’t like me…
I’m no easy ‘fall-for-you’ girl…
I ain’t no sweet talker,
i don’t tell him if he’s my world…

But just the thought of you,
makes me go all sweet sixteen…
like I’d never hurt or been hurt,
by false love beliefs…

I start to smile & I’ll tell it all,
i’ll tell our story to anyone who will hear,
Because I can’t keep in the glow,
as you shine, you make my worries dissapear…

I know i should really question it some,
i should still be discerning as we ‘date’,
but i can’t help but feel like we are so far past
any decisions of that sort we had to make…

Because i love you so much,
I wish I could have known before…
that you would become everything to me,
I can’t imagine ever loving you more…

 

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i want to hold your heart


I sincerely mean it.
When I say someday i want to be your wife
and though you won’t read this…
I won’t let you read this for quite some time…

I know they all say,
I shouldn’t think so far ahead of now…
I shouldn’t be trying on wedding dresses
Or planning our children’s names out…

But I’m living in reality’s dreamworld…
And the future looks so grand after this…
I’m wishing & i’m hoping that we
don’t ever stop treasuring the other’s kiss…

From the bottom of my heart,
from the bottom of my soul,
I have decided it shall be you
whom I forever want to hold.

I want to hold your heart
i want to hold your dreams,
i want to hold your hand,
i want to hold your destiny…

 

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Oh it’s you…


Knowing what you’ve got when you’ve still got it…
that’s just like me & you…
knowing how it it will end, before it happens,
I swear my heart is speaking truth…

when I say this is forever.
when i say the L-word, so overused…
I’ve never felt so certain
without doubt about who i’d choose,

Oh it’s you & your witty jokes,
oh it’s you & your idealistic dreams
oh it’s you & how you care too much,
go ahead & care too much about me…

Oh it’s you & your romantic lines,
it’s you & how you write me reassuring songs,
oh it’s you & your silver blue eyes,
Oh it’s you & it’s been you all along…

I love how you can go off for an hour
about some political irrelevancy,
I love how if you go, you go all the way
I love your great big crazy family…

I love your values how they are rocks,
i love how amazing you are with kids,
i love our late night whispering talks…
I love how I can trust you with all of this…

I love how for the life of you,
you can’t tell me a lie,
& how your lips kind of curl
& give it away if you try,

the best feeling ever is waking up,
& realizing it wasn’t a dream…
It’s so magical what we’ve got right here,
& the best part, is it’s a mutual reality…

 

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Just goes to show


Just goes to show it’s true,
what’s meant to be will be…
You can close your doors, & prolong the fate
but destiny is destiny…

You can call it everything it’s not…
confidants, comrades, just best friends…
you can stifle dreams and feelings all along,
but sooner or later, it all proves pretend…

And reality reveals a deeper truth,
Dreams prove to match from afar,
birth certificates share the same stamp,
…as the same net caught both of our fishing hearts…

Fate lets us get in a goal or two sometimes,
She will make us think we are in control the whole time…
but really we’re just hampsters in a great big sea,
spinning in a ball on waves 10x our size….

We may have clenched our fists on friendship,
held too tightly to everything we held so dear…
But it was fated that we should open our hands,
and thus receive love in the absence of our fear…

 

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TO BE, or to fear?… Resolve of the fearful


BE INSPIRED… i’m trying so hard…
so hard to believe that love is attainable..
BE COURAGEOUS… so very hard
not to shrink from all the risks upon the table…

BE HONEST… who really is?
is that vulnerable when they can’t know?
BE TRUSTING… who knows how?
I only trust my own heart not to run or go…

But then again, it’s running now,
running away with my only chance at love,
if i can’t trust my best friend of years,
then how will i ever be able to open up?

He’s done nothing wrong, but steal my love,
nothing but be sweet & loyal & true…
I hate this stupid wary guarded heart of mine…
and how it tries to pull me away from you…

BUT I SHALL NOT GO! I am inspired…
i shall not back down, i believe in us.
I honestly didn’t know this love existed…
stronger than my own will to run…

I WILL love you forever.
I WILL marry you someday,
I SHALL NOT let my own fear
take the best thing I’ve ever had away….

 

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secrets come naturally


Secrets, they just come naturally to me…
holding in the magnitude is far to easy…
because last time i shared feelings with a boy so deep,
he ran away, far away from me…

I know that was sweet sixteen,
& i was a fool to think it was real,
& this is obviously way more than
any feeling before i ever did feel,

but some scars, never heal,
you are my best friend, thank God…
but even to you, i’m so afraid,
what if we both turn out to be so wrong?

will we be so much more hurt if we know
how much we’ve hurt each other in the end?
maybe we never should have gone out…
I can’t bear the thought of loosing my best friend…

No, I don’t want to break this,
i’m just so afraid if you read all these poems,
that you might change your mind,
or no longer really want to talk again on the phone…

See, this is me freaking out,
some things never change, you know…
This is why I can’t do long distance,
i need you here to hold me, & never let go…

Secrets, are far too easy to keep,
unless I”m looking into your silver blue eyes,
then they all just pour out in great waves,
like the moon entices out the ocean’s tide…

 

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more than a world to me


Don’t make me run away,
Dear God, please help me stay…
so torn between love & fear
just want to have you be near…

& if that means leaving my home…
if that means leaving the sunshine & stars,
if that means leaving my full time job with kids…
Then you know I will do it, but it will be hard…

I’d go days & days without food for you,
give up my last drink of water too,
Just so you know, I want to see this through,
finally i know i’m in love.. with you…

I know there are questions you can’t answer now
but i can wait as long as time is old,
one year with you is worth more than a lifetime without
You warm my heart when I’m cold…

I’d write a thousand songs with your name in them,
or keep it hidden if you asked it of me,
there ain’t nothing in the world i would hold back from you,
I’ll love you as long as I can breathe..

because you are more than a world to me…
you are an infinitly reaching galaxy,
filled with hopes & beautiful dreams,
you are my love, you are my destiny

 

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I’m not blind, i just love you more…


What if it never ends?
what if we really can make this last?
what if we had each other forever?
for your love & heart is all I ask…

I feel like i’m living in an old school musical,
like i’m dancing in the stars of truth & dreams
like a greek goddess being woo-ed by Hercules,
or just some farm girl swooped up by prince charming…

I swear I see moonlight come through your eyes,
and it makes me feel like I”m just dreaming again…
but then your voice is the sweetest reassurance,
with words that make me know you understand…

If we both are in this for the long run,
we have nothing & no one to fear in between,
if we both want nothing more than each other,
then we have already secured our dreams…

I see every awful thing you’ve ever done
And all i want is to embrace you & move on…
No, I”m not blinded by love or lust, i see it…
But i also see that past has long but gone…

I will support you with whatever you choose to do,
as long as it’s what you really want, I said…
i’m not afraid of giving you my heart & future,
because it’s really more of an exchange instead…

“I Love you” sounds so different
when I’m saying it to my best friend…
You know me well enough to know i meant it…
you ought to know, i wont ever let us end….

 

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take what you want of me. it’s yours


Do you remember that poem I wrote?
how i wanted him to write me a song?
He sent me the recording tonight…
and it’s almost as beautiful as his smile…

I love how he claims he hates his voice,
but he knows it is more than enough
to make any girl fall in love instantly,
any girl in the world, but tonight it is me..

Now i only wish he weren’t miles away,
i wish he were sitting by my side…
but somehow i know from the depth of my heart.
this time is for real, & we won’t always be apart…

I love you in a way, i hopelessly give in…
take my heart & future, do as you may wish…
I’m tired of holding in feelings of what we could be…
As of tonight, take what you want of me…

 

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fallen as deep as love goes, im sure


I’m done falling in love,
i can’t imagine any deeper than this…
I get butterflies & sweet dreams
from your goodnight messages…

And I never want to love
anyone in the world but you again…
you will either break my heart,
or make me the happiest girl on the planet…

and i just don’t know how to say this…
i can’t explain the joy & honor within…
i can’t even write a poem that does honor
to your utter & complete perfectness…

I want to hold your hand through it all
be it tearful losses or joyful gains…
you know that i will never leave behind,
nor abandon you in moments of pains…

i would do anything to secure
what i very possibly already have…
though, i know i by no means deserve…
all your love & loyalty… i’m so glad…

i don’t use the word ‘love’
until after a year is my rule,
never happened before,
so I was never made the fool…

but with you, we said it on day 2…
but with you, i’d marry you today,
but for you, i’d realign the star paths,
if i knew it was the only way…

to make you love me

 

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