chart our stars, and melt my heart

in the silence, beats a whisper to the dark…
it’s the soft whimper of a slowly starving heart…
no longer desperate, it has outlived the war,
but it’s missing the hope it had before…

oh so unwise, after all this time,
indecisive and apathetically inclined.
i turn so cold, when i’m afraid,
lest i relieve all the frozen pain…

i want to love, make me a sun,
blaze in the day ricochet off the moon,
i want to awake, i want to flood,
let my walls and darkness come undone

a galaxy too expansive for me,
i couldn’t chose a brightest star,
but now i see, the truth of things,
the brightest depends on where you are…

So come close to me, i want your touch.
i want you to know my heart, my love.
melt the frozen blood, let me cry,
just stay here, at my wounded side.

and I will see your scars, and light your dark.
i will hold your hand, and make you a star chart,
we can dance, on earth it’s more than enough
our day has finally come to free us to be us.

i want my best friend, by my side.
the one who makes me smile any time.
i don’t need a star, or foreign mystery,
i just want to give you everything, all of me.

 

when you stopped being a poem

today, you stopped being a poem,
and became the subject of much more.
no longer a pair of eyes i flirt with,
instead you’re the man i’ve come to adore.

you’ve become the heart i want mine to beat next to,
and the last voice i want to hear tell me goodnight.
of course every love is a gamble of emotions and time,
but you’ve become the risk worth putting my heart on the line.

You stopped being the ideal prince I demanded,
and became the human who makes me roll my eyes.
you stopped being the next best thing for now,
and today, became the main character in the rest of my life.

 

and trust him again…

I decided to stop trying to jump out of the sea
just to assess the horizon ahead…
Some people were meant to fly below the waves,
so i am surrendering to God again, instead.

Within the darknesses, and forbidden light,
throughout the adventures I fervently defend,
among the sharks and schools of the current,
it’s easy to ignore what chaos has come to live within…

and the peace of knowing, the trust beyond,
the faith in walking my heart to His door,
enough of the wild rushes, enough of the fires,
I finally realize the adrenaline is not enough to live for…

 

truths mean more than dares

i didn’t see the point in tying you down
i couldn’t bring myself to throw my heart out,
and when you asked if i agreed and i was sure,
i wasn’t going to argue you into loving me more…

and i may never have told you i loved you or cared,
but i sat there every night and was always there…
some people speak with words that never end,
some people can kiss you into loving them,

and some people write letters, others poems,
and some people like me will never say so…
only want to live in your presence all the time,
laugh at your jokes, and finish words to your lines,

just want to climb mountains and sail seas with you
with unceasing teasing and games of taboo…
some people will never open up the lid
and let all the steam be visible again…

to be honest, i’m still figuring out exactly what love is.
trying so hard to be honest, in every way with this.
I don’t know the future, but I do know my dreams,
i don’t know the right words, and i can’t name feelings.

but i do know that every day we’ve spent as two
i’ve laughed twice as much, and started telling more truths,
closer to the person i want to be, when you’re there,
i guess sometimes a truth means more than a dare.

so all the words i hold unspoken within,
you can read them in how much time i’ve spent,
as someone so set on living all of my dreams,
how could you not know, how much i cared for thee?

 

when its finally mine

and the stars are mine
for the very first time
you know they circle our world,
or at least that’s how it is in our eyes…

and this is the farthest from home
anyone i’ve known has ever gone
i’m living the dream…
if adventure is the measure of these things

this is all i ever wanted
in the deepest parts within
oh i’ve craved this and dreamt this
and planned every part of it

and i told them all to walk away
& i told a few to maybe wait
because this was ‘more important than love’
oh looking back, what a fool i was…

because in the blue waters
of the far southern waves
i see your eyes, and
then white sands are your face,

and in the rising Andes peaks,
i remember how high my hopes reached
and in the starlit night, ‘neath the southern cross
i remember that night when we drove, till the roads stopped

and in the foreign friends i meet,
my eyes go glossy every time i meet a Sweed…
and when the lovers all cuddle neath the setting sun,
i wonder exactly just what i’ve done?

Can i ever fall in love again?
oh adventure is amazing, but i can’t pretend
i don’t miss you everywhere i go…
oh im far too content just being alone….

 

whirlwinds from the stars

She was a whirlwind from the stars
A fiery energy that glowed into their hearts
The one who sung with a contagious laugh
Just close enough to trust but too far to ever have…

And she danced on hot beach nights under full moons
She turned the rhythm of the waves into her tunes
She wrote of magical powers, fairies, lands, and seas…
That she had witnessed every night in her vivid dreams…

And she radiated confidence in destiny & the stars
And she told them to up & follow their hearts
Always too flighty to ever settle in and stay
She left her stamp and then let life’s dawn whisk her away…

Oh she was just a shooting star
Just a wish in passing she’ll break your heart
And you’ll always wonder where she went
And you’ll always wonder what it meant

Nothing more than a dream of yesterday,
Don’t try to hold her, oh let me fly away
For girls like me, we’ve learned better than to trust you guys
Until we find that man who instead of stealing, gives us light…

 

passions glories comforts and grace

Oh it’s one of those nights I can not lie
I just want to hold the world close and snuggle inside
to pull comforts and loved ones to warm the cold
and to ignore the obvious fate that before us all, lies…

and yet as it ticks by, another year with little meaning
i look around at who i should choose to unite
for in the future when i look at the end in fear,
i wish i could have a hand to hold in my fright

Where it all goes, what it all means…
i suppose without love, holds no worth or gain…
so passion, and glory, and money & fame….
If i never give of my heart, my life has been in vain…

 

i’m not ready to love you yet….

And i wouldn’t want to lie to you…
but my these days it’s all i do…
i lie with my eyes & i lie with what i do,
i lie to world , to myself, & i lie to you

because, i’m not ready to love…
i’m not ready to share
i’m not ready to trust anyone else
i’m not ready to care…

i’m still guarding my hope
i’m still guarding my dreams
i’m still aching over the past
and i’m still not able to sleep…

so just let me go kindly,
let’s shake hands and try to forget
all the words and lies
i have tied us together with…

 

emotion’s tide

Don’t know where emotions grow from
Or what makes them ebb away or run…
Can’t say I crashed into the deep,
As much as that I’ve waded into you & me…

And I wouldn’t write our book just yet
And I wouldn’t name our future pets…
And I wouldn’t envision the place we’ll be…
Because I’m afraid… it’s already happening…

I’m feeling little swirls of giggles & sweet
Getting little urges to kiss you on the cheek,
When i wake up, i see your ‘good morning’ text each day,
And today i realized, I can’t just let you slip away…

Because little quirky memories float like bubbles
Like holding hands, crossing streets over puddles,
You and I playing guitar on El Dorado’s park stage…
all the hippies came to listen on as the blue faded into grey…

You know, I won’t admit that crawling hugginess inside.
But the feelings are washing over like a full moon’s tide…
And looking back, over all the lemon ice cream days,
I can’t let the distance just make them drip away…

 

strong enough to hope

it’s easy to see how those girls
in the street got their starts
just took some good boy they loved
to turn into an asshole & break their hearts…

and sometimes the hardest time to feel accepted
is in the middle of those you love
and the only places that feel like home anymore…
are all the secret destinations to which you run.

I didn’t need a hero or a saint
i didn’t want a love song that would fizzle & end
i didn’t want a night full of false promises
all i was looking for, was a friend…

Have you ever felt the place you stand alone
is too far, too deep, for anyone else to go?
that instead of elaborating your story, you are cutting it short?
because now the details are actually too bitter to sort…

and realized all the hopes you’d gathered for years
all the promises you made to your heart…
tonight, i’m not okay, tonight, i cried alone,
but that’s okay, because tomorrow, i’ll be strong enough to hope